Trevor Noah Slams Biden, Democrats, Media & GOP: Here’s Everything He Said
The annual White House Correspondents’ Association dinner met for the first time since 2019 on Saturday night, and the first time with a sitting president since Barack Obama in 2016. Comedian Trevor Noah was the guest host , and it did not disappoint. He was throwing tedders at everyone.
The South African comedian criticized the current president. He ridiculed the former president. He took jabs at the GOP and Fox News, as expected. He also ridiculed CNN, Chris Cuomo, MSNBC, Florida Governor Ron DeSantis, Texas Governor Greg Abbott, Republicans in general, news Democrats in general and, well, just about everyone he could within a given time.
Noah only made it to the podium when President Joe Biden finished his monologue mixed with jokes and other serious stuff. Biden acknowledged that he was about to get roasted not just in front of the 2,600 people in the Washington hotel ballroom, but in front of millions of people watching on cable.
Biden said free speech against the US president would not get the comedian jailed like “they do in Russia.”
“Are you serious, Mr. President? I won’t be arrested? Noah asked. The comedian said he would change up his routine, making the crowded room laugh.
Noah then began his comedic assault on everyone, prompting laughs and even “oohs” throughout his part. Here are the things Noah said throughout the night.
“I want you to understand, I’m not here to take anybody down, okay. I could roast gently, you know, like a pair of testicles on the Tucker Carlson special. I’m not doing this just to lure attention, okay. I’m a comedian, not Kyrsten Sinema, okay. And by the way, ditch it for Kyrsten Sinema. Who thought we’d see the day in American politics where a senator could openly be bisexual, but a locked-up Republican, huh? That’s progress, that’s progress.”
Noah said he was “nervous” to hold such an event after the Oscars, in which Will Smith didn’t like a Chris Rock joke, and then Smith stormed off stage to slap Rock in the face.
Noah turned this into a Kellyanne Conway joke.
“I’m a little worried about tonight, I’m not going to lie, you know. I was like I was doing a really mean joke like Kellyanne Conway and her husband came running up on stage and thanking me.”
Noah bragged about the job news reporters do, but then he took a swipe at CNN, particularly former host Chris Cuomo.
“What these people don’t understand is that you have integrity, you would never let your personal relationships affect your ability to be good journalists. Isn’t that Chris Coumo? Where’s Chris by the way? Is- he here? can’t you make it? said Noah.
The comedian’s jokes quickly returned to GOP Gov. Greg Abbott of Texas and Ron DeSantis of Florida. Noah jokingly told the wine-drinking crowd that if they needed a ride home, they could join Abbott, who recently sent illegal immigrants from Texas to Washington, DC by bus.
“A quick note before people order their Ubers home tonight, Governor Greg Abbott generally provides free buses for the Telemundo table. Very classy, very classy.”
Then he hit DeSantis’ recently signed “Don’t Say Gay” bill in the Sunshine State.
“Ron plays a cool man. He won’t tell people if he got the call back, yeah, or as they say in Florida, don’t ask, don’t tell. Am I right? I’ll see you Ron.”
Noah then shifted gears to shoot the sitting president. Noah, who is a bi-racial South African, referenced his own race when explaining why he was selected, obviously referring to Barack Obama.
“Mr. President, thank you for being here, thank you for having me here and I was a bit confused as to why me and then I was told that you get your highest approval rating when an African bi-racial stood next to you. So what did you say Joe, I’m glad I got to do my part and hope it works out.”
Noah then suggested that the first lady, Dr. Jill Biden, voted for Bernie Sanders in the last election.
“Interestingly, even though first lady Dr. Biden went on to pursue her teaching career, yeah the first time a presidential wife did. Congratulations. Now you might think that’s because she really likes teaching, it’s actually because she always pays her student I’m sorry about that Jill Yeah, I guess you should have voted for Bernie.
Biden was then praised for everything that had “researched” during his administration, but was immediately criticized for “up” as in gasoline, inflation and rent.
“I’m going to be honest if you didn’t come I would have totally understood yes, because these people have been so hard on you that I don’t understand. I really don’t know, I think since you came to the office, things are really looking up. You know, gas is up, rent is up, food is up. … No, the first year was really hard for you, sir President, and surely you must be a little worried about 2024.
“President Biden has led the country through some very dark times since he took office, the covid pandemic, the war in Ukraine, the launch of CNN plus. And don’t forget he also won major legislative successes, you know, in his first I might add you know he pushed through a bipartisan infrastructure bill that says we’re doing everything from fixing America’s roads and bridges to upgrading school buses, which enthuses Matt Gaetz, his girlfriend.
White House press secretary Jen Psaki was also not spared as she was ridiculed for catching COVID-19 again.
“Let me ask you how do you keep getting COVID?” Noah asked. “Jen, like your boss hooked us all up with free tests. He doesn’t have your address? What’s going on there?
“They say on the streets that Jen Psaki is going to MSNBC next month. Apparently, being on C-SPAN, the reasons were too high and she wanted more of a challenge, you know, wanting to change things up. … If that’s true congratulations to Jen and your big career move but you know moving to MSNBC is going to be a big change for you because right now your current job is to make the Biden administration look as good as it can, you know, at all price .
“By the way, MSNBC can I just say you’re doing a great job, you know. I love watching your shows, you know, when Trump was in office, your shows were about how bad he was. And now that Biden is in power, your shows talk about how bad Trump was. Consistency is important.”
Noah then thanked the politicians, journalists, celebrities, winners and others in attendance.